A while back, I read an article entitled,40 Mistakes Men Make While Having Sex With Women. If this is not enough to make a man want to embrace celibacy, I don’t know what is. Of course, what gives it a high “ouch” factor is that some of it is actually true. Reading it, I thought about how some of these things also apply in the blogging world. For example:
1. Not kissing first. Some of you folks out there, and you know who you are, hit people up with links before even saying hi first. Come on. What kind of skank gives it up before even kissing? Jeez. You are put on our mental “Avoid This Creep” list.
2. Ignoring the other parts of her body. Yes, you need to be focused in your niche, if that’s what your gig is. Still, keep in mind that your readers have other needs besides inhaling pure knowledge. They may need to laugh, see a picture or video and, most importantly, feel that they matter to you. Don’t have, um, tunnel vision.
3. Stopping for a break. Unless you are really, really good, we are not going to pick up where we left off. And probably not even if you are that good. So make sure you are posting regularly.
4. Undressing her awkwardly. It looks bad when you are caressing your code and your blog looks jacked up all of the time. It is a sure sign of inexperience. We all have to start somewhere, though, and I am certainly guilty of this myself, being the code virgin that I am. But people do notice.
5. Talking dirty. Moving right along…
6. Going too fast. Many of you are writing about how to install plug-ins, change templates and other geek things. Usually, your directions don’t make any sense to non-coders. Go slow, and make sure your reader enjoys the experience. Plug-ins. Heh.
7. Coming too soon. Don’t think that your reader gets any pleasure out of those posts that take 10 seconds to read. Recite the state capitals in your head so that you last longer.
8. Not coming soon enough. No one wants to read 2000 words about how interesting the Alexa ranking system is. No one.
9. Making her ride on top for ages. Guest blogging is a great thing, and it is always interesting to see new writing on a blog. Just don’t do it very often. Make sure you are doing some work too.
10. Taking pictures. One or two pictures is fine. Lots of pictures is usually not, unless you are a photoblogger or showing a tutorial. It makes it appear as though you are too lazy to write.
11. Not being imaginative enough. I’ve mentioned the importance of experimentation before. Don’t write the same old blah blah. Mix it up a bit.
So there you have it. Enough information to make you feel insecure about your blog for at least a week. Check back later for my article entitled, Why People Really Hate You, And 7 Reasons That Will Never Change. Have a great Sunday!
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Information Improvisation
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